I started this blog at the start of the year as I was getting back on plan and that lasted what 2 maybe 3 weeks.
Life this year has been hard, not for me personally but there have been things with my gran who has now passed away, my mums has also been ill. Work, well less we say about that the better but I’ve not been happy. I’m still not happy but I don’t really like talking about my real life on the internet. The life I create on the internet is a much safer protected space and that’s not to say I don’t tell the truth or make things up but I guess we all try and put out the perfect versions of ourselves out there and things have been far from perfect but I’m hopeful that we’ve turned a corner.
When I started the blog I was following SW on my own terms, I’m sure I mentioned what I was doing in an earlier post.
Last time I was a member of SW my consultant wasn’t great, she was a lovely person but she really didn’t know how to deal with people over 13 st. She didn’t really eat much of the food other than ready meals or so it seemed and she didn’t know about syning “tweaks” I felt like I knew more than her and I had been a member longer than she had. Onet thing I did get from her class was a good friend. We had a buddy WhatsApp chat going and when we both stopped going we did still chat. A few days ago I decided to send her a hello how are you message. As a result, she mentioned she was rejoining another local class and I decided I’d go with her but the rain stopped me. It’s a crap excuse but I couldn’t face a 20-minute walk in the pouring rain.
This morning I needed to go to the hospital for a blood test. I was early and where I’d been dropped off to get the bus there is a 7.30am SW class. I decided to pop in. I’d got a voucher for free membership still in my bag from the Wednesday and I’d previously text the consultant at this class to see if a 7.30am was a real thing. (it is – please have one in Manchester city centre)
I did it, I walked in and signed on the dotted line. I explained I couldn’t say and she got me registered and weighed before the class started rather than making me wait till after image therapy as in the usual route for new members. I was quite sad I couldn’t stay for the class but my main aim was to sign up. I know I can’t go to that class as a rule as I need to be at work at 8 am. She does have other classes and she was fine when I mentioned I might be chopping and changing for a few weeks till I can settle in a group.
While image therapy isn’t for everyone I do like it when it’s done right, when a consultant can control the class and recognise when the person wondering why they’ve gained as they’ve been perfect confessed to the weigh in lady they had 14 cans of Stella and a kebab at weekend. errrr I see you.
My original consultant was lovely but she did let the wrong people dominate the classes, my next one the one I mentioned before was too new and I never felt inspired.
Over the years we had a few stand in and some of them were great but I couldn’t get to their classes and now I feel like I want to find someone I can relate to, someone who knows what it’s like. Someone who doesn’t body shame as most slimming clubs do. Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels. Mate, you’ve never had Costco carrot cake clearly! Pringles, the joy then the painful tongue as the salt burns it.
I need a plan, I need support, I need to be in a space where I can enjoy learning and get inspired.